Unexpected Gift

I have come to a realization that this is a gift

wrapped badly and delivered unexpectedly.

I have come to a decision long ago

To let people's voices affect me so.

But, God, with all His goodness

and everlasting love for me

Has saved me from this insanity

of doing things I cannot see

myself doing in the years to flee.

I have made a promise to myself

even if I have not uttered it yet

to do what my heart speaks of me

to use God's gifts of creativity.

It is the hardest decision yet for me,

because I am not well-off financially.

In fact, now-a-days my wallet is empty,

hoping the best to come, finally.

I am working my guts out there,

doing things I never thought I'd dare.

I have used my strength without despair

failed a couple of times here and there.

But God's love, I know, is great.

Greater than anybody's hate and

disgusting look upon myself and

dismayed by choices I have made.

God's love is BIGGER

than what I could offer with my hands held down.

This feeling of defeat will not last,

for He is a faithful man that bless us that fast.

Things may not go as we have planned,

but His plans are more vast than this land.

I know He will do as what He has promised

because thoughts of it filled my heart lavished

by His love and grace I cannot explain,

He took away all my pain.

Opened my empty hands so I can gain

blessings that are very hard to contain.

Oh God, my Lord,

Your gracious and mighty loving

is the only thing in this world I know is worth keeping.